Wednesday, September 7, 2011

My Poor Boy


Today James was supposed to start his last year of preschool. Instead he spent the day at Primary Children's learning how to live with diabetes. Its not fair. No 4-year-old boy should have to try and understand why he has to get shots multiple times a day, or why he has to wait to eat until he's been poked two or three times. No one should have to be his parents practice pin-cushion. Its not fair. Its a life long disease. And he's only 4. It will be part of every memory for him. I know there is nothing I could do to prevent it, but I can't help but feel responsible when I see my boy in the hospital. Did I mention its not fair? I know that it is much easier to control these days, and that maybe a cure could be found at some point. I know there are worse things to be diagnosed with. But, none of this knowledge makes it easier. I just feel so upset. But, I also know that I am so lucky. I have the most amazing support system. I have 3 close friends/family members with children with diabetes who are open books for our questions and insecurities, as well as innumerable other people just there for me for any reason. I had 40+ email/facebook responses and many texts and phone calls today from people looking out for me. That's love. I know we will be ok. I know we will get the hang of it. I know we will be stronger for it all. But right now I'm upset, overwhelmed and sad. I'm just sad. My poor boy. Its not fair.

6 comments:

the emily said...

I'm sad for you and for him. There's no sugarcoating this one--it sucks. I imagine 100 years ago, something like this was a death sentence. So I suppose there is a bright side, and it will get easier. But for now, I'm with you--it's sad and hard! I will keep you and James in my prayers and hope you all get the hang of it really soon. I know it's possible to live with it, and you'll get better at it. Good luck with the coming weeks--YOU CAN DO IT! Delos and Misty have this on their fridge, and every time I think of it I smile: "LARSONS CAN DO HARD THINGS". Well by golly, so can Davidsons. And Owens. :)

Summer said...

Diane, what a challenge! How is James doing? How did you know you needed to take him in to the doc's? You're all in our prayers!

The Woolley's said...

It's not fair! And you are allowed to cry and James is allowed to cry! But I know with the Lord's help you can do it! We'll definitely be praying for you! Love you Diane!!

Rob & Tiffanie said...

I agree that it's just not fair. I ddin't even realize that they kids that little can get diabetes. It is all new right now and soon it will jsut be a part of your routine. My niece just got diagnosed being allergic to all dairy last year and it seemed impossible to figure out what they could eat now. But now they have figured out a lot of stuff and it just comes naturally now. Although she has had to go without alot like at parties and stuff, but the kids are strong and James will get used to this new lifestyle and be able to teach others. We will pray for you guys that this transition goes well for you:)

Stacey said...

I'm so sorry Diane! It is so hard to deal with something like that. Hang in there. We love you!

Dan and Donna said...

Diane, great comments from many that love you. We are keeping you in our prayers and also know that the Lord is aware of you! Trials like this, believe it or not, make us stronger. I know that what we went through with Darryl helped us to help others who needed support. Hardly a day goes by that I don't think of him and wonder who he is teaching the gospel to now. Hopefully we'll get to see you soon. Much love, mom & dad